Monday, August 23, 2010

I don't need you....

planned ob·so·les·cence [ plànd obsə léss'ns ] noun

ensuring that something becomes obsolete: a policy of designing and making products that quickly become outdated or wear out, so that they must be replaced

Is this what G*d had in mind when he created parents?  That within a certain amount of time, you raise your kids right out of  their need to require you a a necessity in their life?

I am hearing it more and more in their choice of language every day, "I don't need you Mommy" ~ "I can do it myself" ~  "no, No, NO/NO/NO" ~ "Stop singing" (I'm no Barbra Streisand, but please).

It is just in their nature to pull away, and everyday there is a new addition to the list that they no longer choose or need for me to do. 

I realize they have many years ahead and there will be different needs, less physical, more emotional and psychological  and they will be less obvious than those of small children ~ still it underscores what everyone who has already raised children knows, these times are so temporary and fluid that you simply can't take them for granted. 

I have noticed that with their growing grasp of the English language they are using other phrases that help soften the blow of their ever-changing evolution towards independance. My son now will cry out "I want my mommy" ; a soothing  salve to a mother's soul.

That is perhaps the greatest compliment he could give me, it is a wonderful thing to be "needed" but it is glorious to know someone seeks you out and desires you especially.

Cheap Trick said it best:

I need you to need me,
I want you to want me,
I love you to love me...... 

and so it goes ~

Monday, August 2, 2010

Hi and By July

I could have sworn I just saw July fly by here a second ago.  Did you see it?  I vaguely remember the 4th of July, a reunion of our China Travel Mates, Lil Dude's birthday, followed by my birthday, followed by Aubriana and Gary's birthdays together. 

There were pool outings, and water slide days and many cakes and candles and presents and suddenly the calendar says it is August.  The official winding down month of summer, where the thermometer tests it's limits on how high it can reach.  I shockingly noted in June, the half way mark between last Christmas and this next Christmas.

Time seems to be in a hurry to create tomorrow before I can register today, and so it goes.  My "babies" are now 3 and we took their annual photos; gone are the days of placing them on a prop and them staying until the photo is done.  These older models, have a mind of their own and the two individuals are rarely on the same track at one time.

Fleeting, that is what childhood is, and never more clear is it to me than when the new photos take their proper place next to their predecessor's.  When did his hairline fill in?  Wasn't her face rounder last year?How did they get so big so soon?  I just want to hit pause for a moment,  and take it in, but time will not pause for anyone, and that is why we capture them on film, to pause at least that moment in time to keep it as best we can, because time is in a hurry to create tomorrow and today is already yesterday.

Goodbye July,