Family

When you are the parent of an adopted child, there are certain roads you are going to cross that biological parents won't ever be challenged by.  Where do I come from? Why didn't my other parents want to keep me? Why don't I look like anybody in our family?  Are we a "real" family?

In the back of my mind I am trying to formulize how I will answer these questions and what the best way to answer them will be.  I want to be honest without causing pain, informative enough to ease the ache to know and not so selfish as to act as this was always how it was meant to be and part of a higher power not to be questioned.

In my thoughts my children are a part of me from head to toe, I couldn't love them any more if I had delivered them myself and in my heart, mind and soul they are MINE. 

I had an interchange with Lil Dude this week, that made my heart sing, and help me realize that the seeds of love, acceptance and being a part of a circle of love have definitely been planted and are taking root.

We were looking out my bedroom window and watching children coming home from school.  I pointed out a Daddy and his two daughters trailing behind him, then some boys riding their bikes home together, and several other sets of children who happened to be passing by us during this moment in time.

I said to Lil Dude, "One day you and sissie will go to school every day just like these kids.  You will make friends, learn about the world and have lots of fun.  Mommy will miss being with you when you are gone because she loves you both so much and wants to be with you all the time, but when you come home you'll tell me all about your day."

At this point he gave a soft smile and laid his head back on my shoulder and still gazing out the window he said, "FAMILY".

Yes my joy, family.